Before You Use

Man at computerI know the porn habit is strong and stubborn, having had it myself.

So today you may be one of the millions who feel the enticement to use the stuff. Before you do, as a Christian, would you please ask yourself these simple questions today?

  1. Would you view this material, and stimulate yourself while viewing it, while sitting on the altar of your local church? Because if you wouldn’t think of doing such a thing inside an earthly building, why would you do it with your own body which is the temple of God?
  2. Do you think the woman in the video has feelings, dreams, loved ones, and parents? Because if she’s someone’s child, mother or even wife, and if she has a heart, which she does, what do you think this film did to her heart, and why would you support that?
  3. How long will you enjoy this time of viewing the porn, in contrast to how long you’ll feel badly about it? Because if the length of time you enjoy is significantly less than the length of time you’ll regret it, isn’t that a rather stupid investment you’re about to make?
  4. God will surely forgive you if you view this, but does it matter to you whether or not you grieve Him and hurt His heart? Because if it does, is His grace something you really want to exploit, or something you want to appreciate by responding in obedience?
  5. Are you trying to give yourself something – comfort, relief, distraction – by viewing this porn? Because if you are, is it really so hard finding more legitimate ways to get what you’re looking for?

Know what you’re doing, and know you have a choice. And please – from all of us in the Body of Christ – make the right one.

Because we need you.

 

Comments

Gregory Hatton | Feb 24, 2014

Why didnt I read this last night. So true and thankyou for the reminder.

Eddie Renz | Feb 28, 2014

Off topic, but curious why you would use a stock photo for this post that has the watermark on it. Stock photos are a few bucks and as Christians we need to pay for the art we use.

These are good questions, but would do little to deter me from looking at porn once the mood struck. I hope they are beneficial to other men who struggle.

Concerning #2 - that focuses on men who struggle with heterosexual pornography and not men who struggle with looking at men - sometimes men who are fully clothed and not even in porn, i.e. - Facebook, Instagram, Twitter.

Concerning #3 - Over time a heart can be hardened. I rarely feel guilt and shame looking at what I consider non-porn items that still turn me on. I think that this shame feeling is often not a deterrent but only part of the shame cycle that leads back to the addiction.

Giving me reasons not to look at porn will almost never keep me from looking at it because I can easily justify in the moment. What has helped is having accountability "sponsors" who actually check-in with me every 24 hours and I take one day at a time. I've been to an amazing counselor, I go to group meetings every week, and I have a mentor. Without them I think I would probably have given in long ago to sexual temptation and acted out in reality instead of just online.

Change doesn't happen without spending time in the word and drawing closer to Christ. I've been a Christian for 33 years and for 22 years of those I've struggled with same-sex attraction and an addiction to pornography. I didn't start having a breakthrough and recovery until I started confessing my sin to others and asking for help. I'm still a virgin and I've been active in ministry most of my life. I'm even a seminary student, but all of that doesn't matter without heart change.

Pornography is tricky since it is a physical addiction that provides immense pleasure and for single men and women who are celibate it is an easy temptation when you are feeling inadequate, lonely, unloved, etc. An intimate relationship with Jesus will help fill this void, but if sin has been our master for an extended period of time then it is hard to stop obeying that master no matter that we have a new master and are free from sin.

I hope this comment doesn't sound critical. I've just read too many short lists like this which have good information, but don't go deep enough or take it to the next level. I need more steps on "What's next" when it comes to overcoming addiction.

I'd say:

1. A broken and contrite heart
2. Consistent Confession
3. Gospel-centered Community
4. Dedicated Accountability
5. Daily quiet times with a focus on spiritual purity
6. An understanding that we are not inadequate, unloveable, unworthy, but that we are EXPENSIVE. We were bought with the blood of Jesus Christ. We are fiercely loved.

I love the end of this post. Good closing comments. I love this ministry. I love recovery ministry because it forces us to be humble, vulnerable and weak, and when we are weak, then He is strong.

Emma Joy | Mar 9, 2014

I was so blessed by this post! Thank you SO, so much.

Please check out my blog which has articles, etc. on a variety of topics including: "Homosexuality", "God's word", "Is Jesus the Only Way?", "Purity", "Self Esteem", "About Masturbation" and "About Pornography."

http://www.babypinkroses.blogspot.com/

Emma Joy

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