Keeping Motives Alive

Every Monday we post something about maintaining your sexual purity. Hope it helps

Keeping Motives Alive 

I’ve yet to have a Christian man come into my office and ask, “Is it OK for me to use porn? Or cheat on my wife? Or hire a prostitute?” Knowing right from wrong is seldom the problem with my clients. But staying motivated to do what we know is right (and to not do what we know is wrong) – now there’s the challenge.

A simple exercise I call Motive Review can be helpful. Developing a Motive Review means simply making a list of reasons you’re personally motivated to stay clean. (I’ve put a sample list at the bottom of this post)) On the list, you’ll see 35 lines and each line needs to be filled in with the reasons you’re motivated to stay pure. You’ll notice I’ve started you off with five reasons that, I’m sure, apply to anyone. Now you fill in the rest. Think of the things that matter the most to you – the people you love, the life you want, the physical and emotional health you’re aiming for – and write down 30 of them until the list is filled.

Then, after your daily devotions, read this list aloud. It will be a mental reminder to you of the things in life you want to protect and preserve, and it will emotionally jump-start you by reminding you of what matters the most. That, in turn, will pump up your motivation, keeping it alive and intact. I’ve noticed that when we repent of sexual sin, we frequently leave a huge void in our lives that has, up to this point, been filled with wrong behaviors that we’ve incorporated. To keep ourselves from returning to them, we need to incorporate new behaviors that will provide checks and balances. This can become one of those new behaviors. Try it and see if it doesn’t enhance your motivation to keep it clean.

Motive Review

List 30 reasons you are personally motivated to stay away from

the behavior you’ve rejected. After filling this list in, be sure to

read it once daily after your devotions.

I want nothing to interfere with my intimacy with God.

2. I want to be part of the solution, not the problem.

3. I want to be the sort of man I can respect.

4. I want to edify, not damage, the Body of Christ.

5. I want to leave a godly legacy.

6. _______________________________________________________

7. _______________________________________________________

8. _______________________________________________________

9. _______________________________________________________

10. _______________________________________________________

11. _______________________________________________________

12. _______________________________________________________

13. _______________________________________________________

14. _______________________________________________________

15. _______________________________________________________

16. _______________________________________________________

17. _______________________________________________________

18. _______________________________________________________

19. _______________________________________________________

20. _______________________________________________________

21. _______________________________________________________

22. _______________________________________________________

23. _______________________________________________________

24. _______________________________________________________

25. _______________________________________________________

26. _______________________________________________________

27. _______________________________________________________

28. _______________________________________________________

29. _______________________________________________________

30. _______________________________________________________

31. _______________________________________________________

32. _______________________________________________________

33. _______________________________________________________

34. _______________________________________________________

35. _______________________________________________________

To download this post as a PDF file, click Keeping Motives Alive.

Please Note: Joe is beginning an online, live telephone support group for men who struggle with porn or other forms of acting out. For more information click here.


Bernard Turner via Facebook | Sep 19, 2011

Great idea, thanks!

Bernard Turner | Nov 10, 2011

Great idea, thanks!

Add Comment