Wanting to Will

Every Monday we’ll post something about maintaining your sexual integrity. Hope it helps.

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Wanting to Will 

“Draw me, and we will run after thee.” – Song of Songs 1:4

God initiates; we respond. So whatever we do by way of worship, service, or obedience, it’s done only because He first gave us the desire, then the ability, then the opportunity. Paul summed it up nicely: “For it is God who worketh in you, both to will, and to do of His good pleasure.” (Philippians 2:13)  So ours is no fifty/fifty contract between two equal parties. Rather, it’s a loving union in which the Creator fashions then draws His created ones to Himself, and to His purposes. The creation is, of course, able to resist, refuse or rebel, and it often does. But when it works, it works not because we wisely come up with the plan of following Him, but because He draws us, and then, by His grace, we run after Him.

This is a season of new starts. As clichéd as New Years resolutions are, they’re all but unavoidable, even if we call them by a different name. So at the beginning of a new year we determine to do things differently, consistently, and better. And that’s as it should be. There’s something inspiring about buying the new calendars and day-timers, seeing sheet after sheet of clean pages waiting to be marked with plans and appointments. It all says “possibility; fresh starts; new ventures.” So OK, let’s ride that momentum and determine yet again to do it better, cleaner, godlier this year.

But by now (January 7, one whopping week into 2013) I’m already tired. I’ve already let some commitments slip, and lowered standards I promised myself I’d keep intact. That reminds me, more than ever, that not only are good intentions birthed in me by Him, but they’re sustained by Him as well. He first worked in me by implanting in me a desire to do His good pleasure; now I need Him to empower me to do it as well. Every standard He raises – that is, every time I’m inspired to raise my sights, try something new, improve my patterns – it becomes a reminder of my dependence on Him, and the stark, practical observation He made in saying “Without Me, ye can do nothing.” (John 15:5)

Full disclosure: 2012 wasn’t a banner year for me and my house. Some terrific things happened, for sure, particularly in ministry opportunities and new achievements, but we got hit with a freightload of trials, disappointments, and conflicts. And don’t even get me started on how last year’s cultural and political climate affected me. So by the time we had our midnight toast last week, it was more of a good riddance to a tough year than the welcoming of a new one, meaning that I am, as of this writing, all too ready for some new starts.

Yet even as I say that, I’m reminded how easily I default back to old patterns, no matter how committed I am to new ones. So now, more than ever, I think I get what the Shulamite meant when she said “Draw me, and we will run after thee.” I’m likewise making a point to ask daily for Him to draw me by giving me increased faith, greater wisdom, and hotter zeal, none of which I can generate on my own; all of which I need nonetheless.

So what else can I do but plead, like a desperate man once pled, “Lord, I believe. Help Thou my unbelief.” (Mark 9:24) In fact, while I’m asking, I’ll also add:

Draw me; inspire me; empower me. Because You’ve placed on my heart a desire for holiness and fruitfulness, which I thank You for. But don’t leave me with the desire apart from the power. I’ll step out of the boat, You make the water solid, and together, me in You, we’ll see Your purposes accomplished in, and through, this limited vessel. And when that happens, we’ll both know who gets the props.