Dying to Love

Love. How did one show it?
How could God Himself show truth and love at the same time in a world like this?
By dying. The answer stood out for me sharper and chiller than it ever had before that night: the shape of a Cross etched on the history of the world.”
-Corrie ten Boom

The questions about the Orlando killings just keep coming. Was the shooter secretly gay? How much did his wife know? Could the FBI have done more? Did he have ISIS ties, or just ISIS sympathies?

The one I hear the most, though, is one I’m glad so many Christians are asking: How should we respond?

That’s a good place to start, and I’d say the answer points us to a call to die. Death is foundational to a disciple’s life, a fact Jesus made no bones about when He declared, “If any man come after Me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross, and follow me. For whosoever will save his life shall lose it: but whosoever will lose his life for my sake, the same shall save it.” (Luke 9:23-24)

Death to self means dying to what comes naturally to us, for the sake of the Kingdom, which gives a prophetic relevance to the quote above from Corrie
ten Boom.

Her family, godly Dutch believers who sheltered Jews during the Holocaust, faced horrific conditions that make our current challenges look pretty tame. But the principles she learned as a result apply today. Dying to love – that is, dying to ourselves for the sake of truly loving our neighbors – is the unavoidable call for the modern believer.

Today I’m aware of my desire to belong, my desire to ignore, and my desire to be superior. If I’m going to love, then a death sentence has to be pronounced on
all three.

Dying to the Desire to Belong
“It’s better to be yourself and be an outsider than to lose your soul just to fit in.”
-Author unknown

Few things come more naturally than our preference for getting along. Nothing inherently wrong with that – Paul himself urged us to do that very thing when he wrote:

“As much as possible, as much as lieth within you, live peaceable with all men.” (Romans 12:18)

So of all people, Christians should be the most gracious, courteous, and easy to get along with. But when faced with a choice between taking the right (though unpopular) position versus the comfort of getting along, Paul also has this to say:

“For do I now persuade men, or God? or do I seek to please men? for if I yet pleased men, I should not be the servant of Christ.” (Galatians 1:10)

When truth is being publicly and prominently revised, then stewards of truth have no choice but to risk cultural disapproval for the sake of honorable stewardship.

There’s the rub, since the power of wanting to belong can’t be overstated. It shows up when otherwise intelligent college students submit to scandalous humiliations and abuse for entrance into fraternities. It’s evident when we join groups, conform to fashion trends, or identify with parties and causes. We are by design social creatures, longing to belong, and susceptible to adjusting ourselves to fit the majority mold.

If this world wasn’t fallen, and the majority was thereby correct, then there’d be no conflict between the desire to belong and the command to obey God. But, of course, that conflict exists and is evident in everyday life.

Ever since sin entered in the Garden, humanity perpetually flows in the wrong direction. So Paul reminded the Ephesians that in their unregenerate state they “walked according to the course of this world, according to the prince of the power of the air, the spirit that now worketh in the children of disobedience.” (Ephesians 2:2)

And of the world itself, John said, “For all that is in the world, the lust of the flesh, the lust of the eyes, and the pride of life, is not of the Father, but of the world.” (I John 2:16) Thereby Jesus Himself noted: “If you were of the world, the world would love its own. But because you are not of the world, but I have chosen you out of the world, therefore the world hateth you.” (John 15:9)

The believer, then, lives in opposition to the direction and ways of the world, proof positive that his citizenship is elsewhere. (Philippians 3:20)

No wonder God commanded the Israelites to remain separate from the surrounding nations (Deuteronomy 7:1) just as He commands today’s believers to remember their status as strangers and pilgrims here (I Peter 2:11) and choose their social allies wisely (I Corinthians 15:33) knowing they are in, but not of, this world.

It’s not that God dismisses the value of belonging. But He knows how the wish to be among, rather than apart, can induce a believer to the worship of false gods, or the adoption of false beliefs. Both are perilous.

Dying to the Desire to Ignore

The timidity of many churches created a void the world has nicely filled. We may not have wanted to talk about gay couples, sex-change surgery, or gender identity problems from our pulpits or in our Sunday School classes. But the tv shows our kids watched, the teachers who had them five days a week, and the online community they soaked themselves in sure wanted to!

So if the upcoming generation listened to the voices most interested in discussing these things, while the Church avoided these messy subjects, who’s really
to blame?

Just as clearly as the believer is called to remain separate, he also has a mandate to engage, serving as an ambassador sent to this world (II Corinthians 5:20) while retaining fidelity to the One who sent him.

So Jesus referred to us as salt and light (Matthew 5:13), commanding us to preach the gospel (Luke 24:47) love our neighbor (Mark 12:30-31) and participate in acts of service (Luke 10:25-37) and discipleship making. (Matthew 28:19) All of which, of course, requires engagement.

This means I’m to deal with the world without allowing myself to be conformed to it, and when faithfulness to truth compromises my “good standing” in the world, I must remember to love my enemies (Matthew 5:43-48) loving them enough to tell them what is in their best interests even if they don’t realize it (II Timothy 2:25) and above all, choose obedience to God over and above my desire to get along.
(Acts 5:29)

Opposition to current trends will evoke such tension that many, including pastors and leaders, will be tempted to either convert their positions, or minimize
their importance.

Conversion will occur when pastors adopt revisions of the Bible, as many are now adopting today, rewriting clear mandates and prohibitions.

Minimization will occur when leaders claim gender-related issues are secondary – like disputes over eternal security or correct forms of baptism – and thereby nothing to become adamant about. Look no further than this week’s resignation of a prominent Indian Well’s pastor who felt he could no longer subscribe to his church’s position on homosexuality, and felt the church should instead take a more neutral stance.

When either happens – conversion or minimization – the end result will be a better standing in the world’s eyes. A sure way to popularity in the modern West is to set yourself apart from traditional Judeo-Christian doctrines concerning sex and the male/female contrast. You’ll be applauded for your enlightenment; appreciated for your tolerance. You’ll belong.

You’ll also be terribly wrong, because both options –revising the truth or minimizing its importance – are unacceptable.

The establishment of the Male and the Female is foundational to the Creation Account (Genesis 5:2) and reiterated by Jesus Himself as the Creator’s intention for the human marital experience. (Matthew 19:4) This is essential doctrine, not a minor issue we can “agree to disagree” on. Refusing to recognize its importance in the interest of getting along is as wrong as revising ancient truth to fit a modern paradigm. Peace when possible is preferable; peace at the expense of truth is a common but wholly inexcusable error.

Dying to Desire for Superiority

Jesus said, “He who has seen me has seen the Father.” (John 14:9) To see God’s heart towards what we might call “sexual sinners”, we need only look at Christ’s response to them.

To a Samaritan woman with a checkered past He shows respect and a desire to engage. (John 4:1-42)

To a guilty adulteress He shows tender mercy while forgiving her sin and forbidding its repetition. (John 8:11)

To a prostitute He shows open respect by accepting her tearful gift and pronouncing blessing and forgiveness.
(Luke 7:36-50)

If the Lord I follow views the outcast with such tender regard, I am reminded that the servant is not above his master (Matthew 10:24) and I therefore have no permission to belittle someone He loves and seeks. Besides which, having been such an outcast, it would be nearly blasphemous for me to forget who I am and where I’ve been.

Which is why I often say our best evangelizing tools may well be our ears. When we sincerely ask someone to tell us about her or his life, not as an object we want to convert, but as a fellow human we regard with real interest, then we can better understand the hopes, pain, questions, and humanity of a person whose behavior we may not be able relate to. Connecting at our commonality may build a bridge straight from here to the kingdom.

That won’t change our position on wrong behaviors, nor should it. But it will enhance our ability to relate, making us all the more likely to be heard when we say to that person, as did the Samaritan to her entire and very receptive village: “Come, see a man, which told me all things that ever I did: is not this the Christ?”
(John 4:29)

I hate everything about last weekend’s tragedy, which shines a harsh light on human evil and the madness of the times. But let’s try to see how these crazy times present a heartbroken church, gazing at a wounded world, with
great opportunities.

Like the opportunity to show compassion for the hurting, fidelity to scripture, boldness of expression, the humility of sinners well aware they’re saved by grace, godly wisdom shown in our conversations and relationships, and consistency of profession and purpose in an age demanding that we abandon both.

Our willingness to say “yes” when God and conscience call us to respond will be evidence of that sort of grace working in us, the same grace we’re yearning (more than ever!) to extend to others.

Whatever their proclivities. Whoever they may be.